Broken Family Effects on Children

“Family is the basic unit of society. This is the most essential component of a country. A home is where a family lives. It may be alternated   to the word ‘house’ but a house is more appropriately referring to the material structure, whereas ‘home’ refers to the intangible things that bind together the family members. It is the immeasurable love and care that keeps together the mother, father and their children. However, no matter how ideal a family in the terms of their relationship, there are still hardships and misunderstandings that will come along the way. It is just part of any relationship anyway. But, the sad part is when one of the family members gave up and the others have no choice but to accept and let go. Thus, the family starts to be broken.”

Divorce is the hardest challenge that can happen to a couple especially if they have kids. It is painful for the husband and wife to finally end their marriage but they are two matured individuals who are strong enough to handle changes in their lives. The impact of this turn of events in a family’s life is more devastating on the children. Not only is that it painful for them on that moment to hear the news that their parents are getting a divorce. But the worst that can happen is the long term effect that can eventually ruin their future.

In most cases, usually one parent keeps custody of his/her children. But despite of that, the thought that they are no longer complete seem unacceptable. Here are some effects of a broken family on children:

  1. A broken home can make a child insecure. Insecure in a sense that he no longer had a complete family he can call his own. For a child’s mind, a family is composed of a father, mother and children. And living without either his father or mother will create fear and insecurities in him. This feeling of insecurities will even trigger if he is around his friends who are living a normal, complete and happy life. This is especially true in school events where the parents’ presence is required. There are plenty of school activities that involve the parents and seeing scenes like these will even make him feel ashamed of his family situation.

Read more: https://stuffyblog.wordpress.com/2012/08/24/broken-family-effects-on-children/

13 Signs You Need To Visit A Marriage Counselor

“Most couples wait too long before seeking help. In truth, you are best served if you seek help sooner rather than later. Negative communication and withdrawal can be equally detrimental. When conversations quickly turn negative, partners can feel depressed, insecure, and disregarded. Withdrawing from or avoiding conversation can have the same effect, and has the added negative result of making unspoken complaints increase in importance and severity as they remain unaddressed.”

We believe we’re getting the fairytale when we get married. You know — meet “the one,” have a whirlwind courtship, get married and live happily ever after. What the fairytales don’t tell you is that relationships take work.

Often times, we don’t go into a relationship with the tools to manage the challenges, which is where the pros come in. And by pros, I mean a counselor or therapist who can help you learn new ways of relating to your partner.

The question is: when do you know it’s time to consider marriage counseling? Here are some trigger points and behaviors that are signs you may need help.

1. When you aren’t talking. In all honesty, many relationship challenges are simply challenges in communication. A therapist can help facilitate new ways to communicate with each other. Once communication has deteriorated, often it is hard to get it going back in the right direction.

2. When you’re talking, but it’s always negative. Negative communication can include anything that leaves one partner feeling judged, shamed, disregarded, insecure or wanting to withdraw from the conversation. Negative communication also includes the tone of conversation because it’s not always what you say, but how you say it. Negative communication can escalate into emotional abuse as well as non-verbal communication.

Read more: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/06/02/marriage-counseling-_n_5412473.html

Teenagers (15-17 years of age)

“Today’s young people, our children, belong to the most promising generation in the history of the world. They stand at the summit of the ages. They also stand at the crossroads of two great paths. It’s appropriate for your teen to want to make her own decisions now, and to think for herself. And yet teens are still developing, and have widely varying levels of maturity. It can be a scary time for parents, especially those who don’t yet trust their teen’s judgment.”

teenager

Developmental Milestones

This is a time of changes for how teenagers think, feel, and interact with others, and how their bodies grow. Most girls will be physically mature by now, and most will have completed puberty. Boys might still be maturing physically during this time. Your teen might have concerns about her body size, shape, or weight. Eating disorders also can be common, especially among girls. During this time, your teen is developing his unique personality and opinions. Relationships with friends are still important, yet your teen will have other interests as he develops a more clear sense of who he is. This is also an important time to prepare for more independence and responsibility; many teenagers start working, and many will be leaving home soon after high school.

Here is some information on how teens develop:

Emotional/Social Changes

Children in this age group might:

  • Have more interest in the opposite sex.
  • Go through less conflict with parents.
  • Show more independence from parents.
  • Have a deeper capacity for caring and sharing and for developing more intimate relationships.
  • Spend less time with parents and more time with friends.
  • Feel a lot of sadness or depression, which can lead to poor grades at school, alcohol or drug use, unsafe sex, and other problems.

Read more: http://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/childdevelopment/positiveparenting/adolescence2.html

Domestic Violence

“Women are more likely to experience domestic violence, forms of abuse occur between all kinds of couples, whether of the opposite or same sex, married or unmarried. While financial factors contribute to the problem, the causes of domestic violence involve psychological issues that we must deal with in order to stop the cycle of abuse. In addition to listening to this critical inner voice, couples involved in domestic violence have often forged a destructive connection, an illusion that they cannot live without each other.”

Domestic Violence

What’s the difference between normal conflict and domestic violence? Conflict is part of every intimate relationship–that’s why conflict resolution skills are important. Domestic violence, however, has no place in a healthy relationship, whether the couple is dating, engaged, married or cohabiting.

What is domestic violence?

Domestic violence is any kind of behavior that a person uses, or threatens to use, to control an intimate partner. The two key elements are threat and control. Domestic violence can take various forms:

Physical – Violent actions such as hitting, beating, pushing, and kicking. In many cases physical abuse becomes more frequent and severe over time.

Sexual – Includes any sexual acts that are forced on one partner by the other

Psychological – Includes a wide range of behaviors such as intimidation, isolating the victim from friends and family, controlling where the victim goes, making the victim feel guilty or crazy, and making unreasonable demands…

Read more: http://www.foryourmarriage.org/everymarriage/overcoming-obstacles/domestic-violence/

I’m A Stay-At-Home Mom, Should I Get A Job?

“A good mother and devoted wife is a priceless blessing in any family. There is just no amount of money that can be attached to this role. The value of a devoted wife and mother is priceless and deserves compensation and the courts know that. But the fact is that life is not fair, and your ex may not be able to pay what you deserve. Use your attorney to get what you can but know that the best approach will include a sound game of reeducation, reentry into the work force, and a positive attitude that you are capable of great things.”

I'm A Stay-At-Home Mom, Should I Get A Job?

To Work Or Not During A Divorce?

Q: I’m a stay-at-home mom. I’m getting divorced. Should I get a job?
A.
If it looks like divorce is inevitable and you’ve been a stay at home mom, you will have to do a great deal of planning to support yourself in your post-divorce life. Here are some tips for before, during and after the divorce.

1. Planning Before Divorce:
First, look at your skills. If you have a college degree or some kind of training, you can focus on getting those skills up to date and ready for the job market. If you don’t have skills, now is the time to start working on acquiring them, and the sooner the better. Look to see if there is a local career counselor who specializes in counseling women re-entering the job market.

 It’s best to go ahead and get a job and start working before the divorce is final. For one thing, it will build up your confidence and show you that you can make it on your own. Another reason is that you will need credit and a work history for a mortgage, apartment or credit cards. It’s a good idea to have a work history of earning your own money, even if it’s just a short time such as three to six months.

What Can I Say That’s Actually Helpful in Times of Grief?

“When a friend loses a loved one, our hearts ache for them. We want so much to comfort, soothe and make things better, yet we end up sputtering out the wrong words because we don’t know what to say when someone dies. There will be times outside the funeral when you will see your friend or family member whose loved one has died. Don’t avoid the situation completely. The first time you see the person go ahead and offer your condolences. If you avoid the situation, you will either make the other person uncomfortable or lead them to believe that you haven’t yet heard the news.”

What Can I Say That's Actually Helpful in Times of Grief?

Dear Lifehacker,
This year has been a very difficult one for me. A close friend passed away and a few other people I know also lost loved ones. I never know what to say or how to act at times like these. What can I say when nothing seems appropriate or it all sounds like cliches?

Signed,
Stumbling for Words

Dear Stumbling,
We’re sorry to hear that. It’s hard not to feel at a loss for words. When someone you care about or know is grieving, words don’t seem to be enough. Expressing your care and support, though, could do a world of good for both the other person and yourself.

 While there’s really no “right” or “wrong” way to help someone grieve, some things might be better to say than others. I spoke with several mental health experts and those familiar with bereavement to find the best approach for this awkward and tough situation we unfortunately all experience.

What to Avoid Saying

Some phrases and words of advice, even if they’re well-intentioned, could make others feel worse and magnify their grief. In general, try to avoid:

Comparing their loss to yours: When someone dies, it makes us think about our own experiences, but saying “I know just how you feel—when my mother/friend/dog died last year…” isn’t comforting. Even though you’re trying to help or connect by empathizing, it might feel insulting to the other person, like you’re trying to minimize the pain he or she is feeling. Andrew Moore, a licensed professional counselor at the University of Oklahoma HSC, says that even if there are similarities to your experiences, their experience is still unique to them. Every death is also unique. A more appropriate response may be to acknowledge—without direction and empathy—that this is a difficult time, e.g., “This must be very difficult, and I can’t truly understand what it must be like right now,” offers clinical social worker Stuart Strauzer. Then give more comforting words or gestures of support (see below).

Read more: http://lifehacker.com/5941009/what-can-i-say-thats-actually-helpful-in-times-of-grief

10 Best Beach Activities for the Family

“The weather was just perfect to hit the beach this weekend. Although all children seem to love being on the beach, sometimes you need to have some ideas for keeping them entertained above and beyond swimming and building sandcastles. Get ready for fun in the sun and sand. Once your little kids have exhausted the waves, there are plenty of land-based activities to keep them busy until sunset.”

best beach activities for the whole family

Do your summer plans say BEACH?  If so, you’re going to love this list of fun things to do with kids.

Honestly, it takes a lot to motivate me to go to the beach.  Mostly, because I don’t enjoy sunbathing, I seriously turn another shade of brown within 10 minutes of being in the sun. I love my sun-kissed skin color just the way it is.  So with that said I try to plan activities that our kids will enjoy doing at the beach which they can enjoy under the umbrella for some shade breaks.

Most of these activities were not planned before I left home so I had to work with the things I found around the beach and where we were staying. Which makes them pretty simple and easy to put together. Also, I usually search the internet after I write a post or in preparing for an article just to see how original my work is and I must say I didn’t find any articles that had these unique activities in their post. Most of them had things like go find seashells, make a sand castle… and those are great but I wanted to share something different.

So enjoy our unique list of beach activities for you and your family.

Read more: http://inspiredbyfamilymag.com/2013/05/18/10-best-beach-activities-for-the-family/

51 Fun Weekend Ideas for Your Family

“Children learn their most impactful lessons at home. The examples parents present have a greater effect on the choices children later make than any other outside force. Planning a family holiday can be a lot like planning dinner. You may think it is quicker and easier if you make all the decisions, but including the kids in the planning process helps avoid sulks, and will buy you some time to indulge in window shopping or a sneaky afternoon nap. While weekends are a time for relaxation and rejuvenation, they also provide the perfect opportunity for lessons in physical fitness. Setting the standard for physical activity early in their lives will benefit your children into adulthood.”

51 Fun Ideas For weekend

Monday morning I met John at the cafeteria. He was brewing coffee and I was there for a cup of tea. He sighed in between the conversation and said “5 more days”. Seeing my puzzled look, he explained further – “to the weekend”. We all wait for the weekend the whole week. Almost 60 hours of time, but most of the time we don’t really pre-plan to do anything on a weekend.

There are so much to do, there are people around, things around. You need to find time and company of your family and friends. I have prepared 51 family fun ideas, these can be applicable to your friends as well.

If I ask, you may say “something fun”. Well, what exactly? I was searching for it for years. These days my fun is sitting in front of the computer and blogging my way through the weekend. Obviously, SMB hates it.

If you ask me how many we do from below. I’ll seriously have to think if we do any. I prepared this list out of my not-so-creative mind. See, if you find a few interesting

51 Weekend ideas that are certainly entertaining and fun yet inexpensive

  1. Go for a fun bike ride. Make sure you look onto bicycle safety. Odds are your family will enjoy cycling for sure. Buy the best bike ever and enjoy outdoor activities. You will be able to implement good habits, too.
  2. Buy a kite. You can even buy a remote control model (Search “RC airplane” on Google). RC airplanes are a lot of fun. Apart of being trendy, this is an innovative and sophisticated toy. Most families enjoy playing with RC models. Don’t hesitate to ask for specifics and guidelines.
  3. Play Frisbee or catch. What if you don’t own one? You can get a plastic disc, a lid may be. Thus, homemade options are viable. There are no excuses in terms of money. You can play non-stop or until you get tired.
  4. Choose a tour. You can consider touring a fun and historic local establishment, such as a radio station, an old newspaper, etc. You will be amazed on the many benefits that this can bring right away. It is about becoming in touch with local culture, too. Ask around and try to spot the best place.

Read more: http://onecentatatime.com/51-frugal-fun-weekend-ideas-for-a-family/